How to write insightful reviews


This could well be the best Game of Thrones review I have ever read. . . :)

From Metacritic:

I love fantasy. I play dungeons and dragons with my friends and sometimes when no one is around by myself. My parents at first didn't want to let me stay up to watch Game of Thrones but I downloaded it so they have no idea I got to see it, but we have HBO so it's okay. I was surprised by all the nakedness. Boobies everywhere. I have a girlfriend, and she said she was offended by it. I wasn't offended though. But since the internet is full of awesome porn, this was nothing. It's like for people who never watch porn? It was really boring. The dwarf sex gave me shivers because of the slurping sounds. I think it scarred me. The doggy-style incest looked like they were bored and just going through the motions. Wow, everyone is doing it doggy style. And then nothing else happened? Sex and someone gets thrown out the windows? Where are the goblins and orcs?

Barnun, my friend, could you please send me links to all your future reviews? You are such an insightful guy. As for Game of Thrones, maybe it's not for you. I think you might be over such derivative crap like that. But fear not, for as you say, the internet is full of awesome porn. Enough to keep a guy entertained, no question.

6 commentaires:

Grack21 said...

This seriously just cheered me up.

And he has a point! The internet IS filled with awesome porn!

ito said...

Spartacus, Blood and sand :)

Rich Mom, Rich Dad. Poor Mom, Poor Dad. said...

LOL

Emily said...

The internet is for porn....

amysrevenge said...

Well, I suppose it was an honest review at least.

Anonymous said...

I actually think this is a totally valid review. There's nothing in it to suggest that he missed the point of GoT. It just isn't his idea of fantasy - he's obviously a fan of the "more frozen zombies please" variety.

Through that lens, GoT probably does look like a bunch of boring crap plus some titilation.

I definitely don't agree with his opinion, I'm a huge, huge GRRM fan, but I am kind of offended that you gave him a "Dumbass of the Week" award when he's really just stating a perfectly uncontrovertial opinion. With the language of a teenager. Which, presuming he is a teenager, is also totally forgiveable.